Over and over again.
It won't happen again. You won't lie to me anymore. You won't hurt me anymore. My walls are up, I'm safe, I'm safe. How pathetic is it that I have to hold myself at night and tell myself that? "I need to work on me, that's why I'm doing this".
Liar.
You're disgusting. I am completely horrified. You made me into this person, this sneaky, manipulative, ugly person. But in the end, I win. I win because I can look at myself in the mirror and know I'm not you, I'm not a liar, not a cheater, not a horrible excuse for a human being. It would take a whole lot more than therapy to fix you. A lobotomy, perhaps? This is who you are. The only joy I take out of that is the knowledge that you can barely live with yourself. Every day, I hope you wake up, look in the mirror, call your fucking self "Daddy" and then cry. Cry like the bitch you truly, truly are. Sleeping with her. Like you did for me - like you just told me a goddamn week ago you'd do for me - oh wait. You were already doing it with her. Yet ANOTHER slut calling you Daddy - let me promise you something, you life-ruining, soul-sucking son of a bitch, you'll never hear it come out of MY mouth again.
"I love you, I want to be with you, I want to work on me and be with you in the end.."
I wouldn't touch you with a ten foot pole. There are men out there that would KILL to be with a woman like me. Who would do ANYTHING to see me smile. And I keep turning them down, pushing them away, waiting for your filthy ass. Ugh, I am a fool. But this time, that won't get me down. This time, it's just a wicked smile and the knowing that you're going to be alone forever, because you're a piece of shit. You're a liar, and a horrible person, and I cannot wait until the day when you wake up and realize you're lonely because you deserve to be.
I've never said that about anyone else alive. Shit, Caden's dad doesn't deserve to be alone. But you do. You'll be lonely forever, because you truly do not deserve to be happy. I hope you can swallow that pill, baby, because you just lost the best thing that ever happened to you. You think your filthy internet sluts will keep you warm at night? Sure, their fat asses may keep the chill off your own, but inside you're cold as ice, baby, and it ain't ever getting warm again. You think those whores can raise your children? Shit, you need professional help to do that. Between your personal issues and their mother's frustration, those kids are ruined. You're two of the worst parents I've ever had the displeasure of being around. I busted my ass to try and fix those kids. There ain't any fixing that. There ain't any fixing you, 'Daddy'. You're broken.
Thing is, I'm not. And right now I am mad as hell, but I don't hate you. That would take too much energy. You simply don't matter. I'm only mad at myself, for wasting my time. For letting something like you around my son. Thank God he's stopped asking for you.
Do yourself a favor; try and win your ex wife back. She's the only one legally obligated to put up with your disgusting ass for the next fifteen or so years.
Deuces, bitches, I'm all the way the fuck out.
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